when boys hold u by yr waist and make you feel tiny
when you kiss boys and you can feel their stubble
freckles on boy
body hair on boy
spooning with boys
when boys get hard while spooning and you can feel it and its really cute
boys in the abstract
1 year later and I’m a lesbian
I m so alone in life it sucks I just want a hug
- friend who lives hundreds of miles away: i made food
- me: can i have some
"A heart to heart"
So today was kind of a shitty day. I live in a place where brown/tanned skin is looked down upon, (Yeah it sucks that Australia (at least the part i live in) is one of the most “amazing” places to live, a fuking 1 st world country, but racism exists so openly). Naturally most of my friends are “white skinned” and beautiful. I dont consider myself “pretty” and to most people it would come as a shock as to why not, and they will rant on and on about how everyone is pretty in their own way etc etc. I dont feel it so thats all that matters.
So I was in university today, and asap the lecture ended i walked out with my friend, this beautiful white girl, and a guy came running after to talk to us. (Little did I know he wanted to talk only to my friend, and not to me, as he didnt give a fuckabout even if i was there or not) The conversation flew from normal subject related stuff to hey do you wanna add on fb? she said yeah alright, and kinnda seemed like wanted to talk just to her. So i stayed a bit distant, they added each other, and he left, she continued walking with me.
This maybe normal i dunno, but to me it felt like how terrible looking i must be that he didnt even wanna know my name, but was so infatuated with my pretty friend. it just sucks. I am not someone who need constant reminders from other people that i m pretty or etc. etc. But this incident just hurt me and felt like a tidal wave lol. oh well.
I guess anyone s opinion on if this is normal would be much appreciated. thanks